1. Ever wonder about those people who spend $2 on those little bottles of Evian water.
Try spelling Evian backward: NAIVE…
2. If the Jacksonville Jaquars are known as the Jags and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the Bucs, what does the make the Tennessee Titans? The Tennessee Tits?
3. There are three religious truths:
a. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.
b. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith.
c. Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at Hooters.
4. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren’t people from Holland called Holes?
5. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
6. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren’t they just stale bread to begin with?
7. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn’t it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, drycleaners depressed and prostitutes delayed?
Time to vote again. I’ll bet most of you pick no.7!
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